A Divine Whisper

[subtlecollision]

Since I don't write poetry very well at all, I thought I'd try something with a bit of structure-- so I wrote a sonnet. I really don't like it too much because it's just sort of boring. Can you guys help me?

A Divine Whisper

In the frosty air I hear a whisper.
A tremulous voice is calling to me,
Waiting a while I decide to answer,
I wait longer now and passionately.

Alas my steadfastness is rewarded,
Happily, eagerly, I seek this voice,
Wondering who I will be awarded,
For whom will I have reason to rejoice?

The voice is familiar, I feel it now,
How could I ever have forgotten it?
I greet my caller with a loyal bow,
Feeling born again, like ashes just lit.

We do not always find God in the clouds,
For he sometimes dwells in what the soul shrouds.

[Catherine]

I adore it.

[Liz]

I love it all except the second stanza. I mean, it's still better than I could do, but it's not up to the level of ther rest of it. I just found it a little unclear is all. Overall though, I really like it.

[subtlecollision]

Thanks guys, but I just don't really like it. Yeah, I know what you mean about the second stanza. I'm just not sure how to fix it.